When the dishes CAN'T wait

Sometimes the house just needs to get cleaned and cleaning it can be quite the challenge when a baby is trying to sleep or when a momma's boy is constantly interrupting you.

Thankfully I have a wonderful husband who happily lugs the little guy around with him to home improvement stores for a few hours so I can get the house cleaned, interruption-free.

Once the house is clean, I feel like I can be a better mom and wife. Instead of worrying about how dusty a room is or thinking about the stack of dishes in the sink, I can focus on playing with CJ and bonding as a little family.

As much as I wish I didn't have to clean, it has to be done. And even though I try to clean throughout the week, it still gets pretty bad every few weeks. Kids are messy. Husbands are messy. Pets are messy. But this family is what keeps me going, so it's all worth it as long as we're all together at the end of every day.

CJ isn't always a momma's boy

I love the persistence and focus that CJ has once he learns something new. Just this week, he's really caught onto waving. As I was leaving daycare after placing him down on the playmat, he pulled himself up on the jumperoo and looked towards the door. As I reached for the door, I glanced back to see him flapping his whole arm at me, waving "goodbye." It was breathtaking. My heart fluttered and I said "Aww, he's waving to me. He's getting so big." And beamed the whole morning just thinking about it. [Facebook status:My little man waved "bye" to me this morning. Made my day!]

Now he waves at EVERYTHING. Yes, everyTHING. Cars, the TV, people, animals. It is absolutely precious, but the best thing he waves at is his daddy. [Note: I haven't really gotten into this yet, but CJ is such a momma's boy most of the time.] When John walks into the room, especially at the end of a week day, CJ beams with excitement, jumping up and down and flinging his arm around, waving. Watching the excitement on both of their faces makes every worry and stressor from the day disappear. This is what life is about - sharing joy with those you love and seeing your little one grow and learn each and every day. From there, it turns into peek-a-boo and trading big smiles with daddy.

But the initial wave and excitement he expresses towards his dad is what I've waited for since CJ is such a momma's boy. Witnessing their interactions and the bond they are creating is inspiring.

Babies don't care about what toys they have

Despite all of the sales advertisements, commercials and TV shows telling you to get the latest and greatest toys, babies don't need all of those toys. Sure, babies need toys/activities that facility their development, but something as simple as a foam letter or burp cloth can do the same. We have toys in almost every room of the house, but let me tell you, I think we have only purchased about 3 percent of those. The rest were gifts or things Grandma bought when she visited.

Toy from GG

My grandma (GG to CJ) bought this turtle filled with balls (you know, the ones kids jump around in at Chuck E. Cheese). The picture shows a baby sitting in the balls in the turtle. That's great in theory, but I think CJ only sat like that for a picture to send to GG and ever since then, he's just been focused on chewing on the balls. He LOVES them, but not the way the toy company envisioned, which is fine. All I'm saying is that these big fancy toys are just things to babies. They are the same as a shoe or a hair brush or a burp cloth.

But what's more important than what toys he is playing with or what non-toy items he finds appealing is how we, as parents, are working with him to develop as a human being. Are we spending enough time reading to him? Are we focusing on the right developmental skills for his age? Should we be looking for additional developmental aids? So many questions, but again, like John has told me many times, parenting is an art, not a science.

Content chewing on his sock.

So the way I see it is, as long as he's happy, all is well. If he is happy chomping away on a foam letter made for the bathtub, then so be it. If he wants to play with the Lil Zoomers Spinnin' Sounds Speedway, more power to him. Or if he just wants to snuggle up while we read a short book before bed, well, that's my favorite. Not only do babies not need every toy in the advertisement, but I don't need every gizmo and gadget - holding my baby close and enjoying him at that moment is better than any toy man can create.

Kids are tougher than they appear

Any time CJ bumps his head or falls down creates an overwhelming feeling of guilt and I am almost positive that my name is being added to an imaginary book of the worst mothers in history. It's hard to ever accept that these things happen, even though I know these kinds of things happened to me as a child.

When I was just about a year old, I climbed up the stairs behind my mom and when I got to the top, she thought I was up there with her so she kept walking. Little did she know I had decided to try to sit up on the top step. Before she knew it, I was rolling down the 12 stairs I had just crawled up. Luckily I rolled like a barrel and ended up being fine, just a bit shaken. She probably ended up feeling way worse than I did because a kiss and a hug made it all better for me. For her, the guilt and thoughts of "what if" hounded her for hours and no words or actions could console her.

TIP: Once your little rugrat starts trekking around on hands and knees (or doing the worm like mine did in the beginning) put up those gates. You may think they can't crawl up the stairs yet and with the blink of an eye, they'll be pulling themselves up and testing the strength of your heart. Babies catch on quickly and move even faster.

How about the time I ran inside from playing baseball with my brother and his friends...holding my head and crying? After deciphering what had happened through my sobs, my mom saw the egg-sized bump above my right eye. My brother had accidentally clobbered me in the head with an aluminum bat during his turn at the plate. It was actually my fault, as I was probably standing too close. But nonetheless, my mom did all she could to stop the initial pain and shock. And then she had to relive the moment of me sobbing in her arms each time I saw her until the lump and bruise disappeared over the next week. Even though it was out of her control, it's a mother's instinct to feel like she should be able to protect her children at all times.

But without these moments, kids won't learn on their own. In the first incident, I don't know that I learned anything because I was so young, but the second one, I was about 7, so I learned to stand far away from the person who has the bat. Regardless, my mom sure felt like the worst mom in the world, much like I did the first time CJ decided he wanted his lip to meet the bedside table.

The dishes can wait

The first nine months on the journey of motherhood have taught me countless lessons about life, love, family, patience, and of course, children. My husband always reminds me that "parenting is an art and not a science" but I thought I would at least get some lessons down on paper for those of us who like to have some kind of guide to what we are doing...even if no child is the same. At the least, this will provide new moms with some comic relief or just plain relief in knowing that we are not alone in the journey and we aren't as clueless as we feel sometimes. So stop multi-tasking and enjoy the ride. The dishes can wait.